I fulfilled my longtime dream

On December 9, 2007, I fulfilled my longtime dream of being a mascot at a sporting event by donning the Testudo outfit at the University of Maryland women’s basketball game against Temple. It was one of the most exhilarating things I’ve ever done, and certainly one of the most satisfying. I spent an hour giving children and adults high-fives, dancing at midcourt, and having my picture taken with anyone who wanted one. Watching people light up – even adults who didn’t expect to be approached by a fuzzy turtle – showed me how easy it is to make another person smile, and how rewarding it is to be the person giving that gift. Listen to the University of Maryland Fight Song

Positive Psychology for Coaches

I have always had the desire to teach because I love to perform and share my excitement with others, but it wasn’t until I was hired to be an adjunct lecturer at New York University’s School of Continuing and Professional Studies on the subject of “Positive Psychology for Coaches” that I got my wish! This picture is from our closing session on April 28^th, 2007 at the 11 W. 42^nd Street campus of NYU, where we celebrated our successful completion. To be honest, this was also a bit scary for me, as I’d never taught for many hours at a stretch, but since I encourage my clients to take risks, I know I have to take risks, as well, if I’m going to reap the rewards that accompany them.

I Got It Done!

Ever since she wrote the first book by a survivor of bulimia in 1988 (“My Name is Caroline,” Doubleday), Caroline Adams Miller has been on a mission to help people create lives of purpose, meaning and balance, which she does now as a motivational speaker, performance coach and author. Ms. Miller’s books and work have been celebrated for two decades in publications ranging from The New York Times and US News and World Report, to dozens of media outlets including CNN, CBS and “The Montel Williams Show.” Her speeches about how to set and achieve powerful goals consistently draw raves, and audience members frequently say that she is one of the most life-changing speakers they have ever been exposed to.

As part of her commitment to be a role model for readers and clients, Ms. Miller maintains a public list of "100 Things To Do Before I Die,” and sets out to achieve a few of them every year. Among the completed goals are getting a black belt, becoming a certified scuba diver, and giving birth to healthy children. In August 2006, she will receive her Masters degree in Applied Positive Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania, fulfilling another lifelong dream to get a graduate degree.

One of the best ways to achieve your own goals is to create public accountability and support by sharing them with a wide audience. To that end, we encourage you to submit your own list of life goals, which we will post on the Positive Goals Gallery on CarolineMiller.com

Go ahead and dream your most audacious dreams! And if you want to schedule a coaching session to help you design your own goals and the plans to achieve them, Ms. Miller will work with you so that you always have a plan of your own.

New Year's Resolutions

"If you think New Year’s resolutions are silly, ineffective rituals that don’t bear fruit, think again. A study of people who set New Year’s resolutions versus a control group of people who intended to change at some later point, showed a significant difference in goal success in the year following their contact with researchers. Fully 46% of resolvers were successful at achieving their goals – primarily weight loss, exercise, and smoking cessation – versus only 4% of the nonresolvers. The signs of success among the resolvers included self-efficacy of change, self-efficacy of maintenance, and readiness to change. The nonsuccessful resolvers used more self-reevaluation, wishful thinking, self-blame, and minimization of threats to their efforts to reach their goals."

"Another particularly interesting, and unintended part of the study, revealed that 54% of the people contacted who did not wish to achieve goals moved from contemplation to action with just three brief phone calls in four weeks from the researchers. Imagine what some phone calls to a trained coach would result in as far as resolutions!"

Why not get started now? Download this form and use it to plot your biggest goals for the year, followed by the benchmarks for achievement, and the goal completion dates. And then, when you’re feeling particularly bold, help yourself to “100 Things to Do Before I Die,” which will help you play even bigger in the game of life.

Don’t forget – a coach can be the best investment in making any and all of these dreams come true. Give it a try – you won’t regret it! - Caroline Miller

(Norcross, J. C., Mrykalo, M. S., & Blagys, M. D. (2002). Auld Lang Syne. Success predictors, change processes, and self-reported outcomes of New Year’s resolvers and nonresolvers. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 58, 397 – 405.

SquashEmpower!

As a Squash Professional with an interest in youth sports, I began coaching in the United States soon after my arrival from Australia 3 years ago. My desire was to start my own Squash and Fitness Club in Bethesda, Maryland but unfortunately could not raise the capital.

The issue of youth obesity, especially in relation to disadvantaged communities, receives prominent media reporting. To address this issue as well as the improvement in self esteem levels associated with weight and success, I developed an Urban Youth Program called SquashEmpower in April 2005.

SquashEmpower brings squash and academic tuition to disadvantaged DC youth. I coordinate the program, seek funding, develop schedules, etc.

The program is wonderful as you will be able to see by visiting http://www.squashempower.org/. Check out the happy faces!

These kids had never heard of squash before, and their success in learning a new sport combined with developing writing skills through journaling has greatly improved their lives. With the community's support we will develop and improve this program for many years to come.

Connie

Success Redefined -- No One can take it Away from Me!

In 2002, the youngest of my three beautiful children and I each experienced two separate health scares that made me stop in mid-sprint. As a result, I felt compelled to create a written legacy for my children that would always be there to guide them in the event that I was not. My goal was to get my philosophy, experience and values down on paper.

I had learned firsthand how quickly other people or events can strip you of your salary, job title, street address, and all the other trappings of so-called success. I decided to redefine success so that no one could take it away from me.

The most important steps in achieving my goal were:
1. Self-sacrifice: Less sleep and temporary time out from the gym. I wrote when my children slept.
2. Accountability: Only to myself. I kept my project under wraps. As a single parent, I didn’t need the added burden of others' expectations.
3. Gentleness: With myself. I set no deadlines or schedules. This book was a gift for my children, and I wanted to enjoy the writing process as much as I enjoyed every pregnancy.

Not only did I complete my written legacy but much to my surprised delight, it was published in 2005 under the title Keep Your WITS About You: Work Smart, Be Happy, Feel Great.

Today, when I look at my book, my favorite page is the Dedication page, which reads, “To my three beautiful children, Elizabeth, Alex, and Christopher, with love from your happy mother.”

Michelle www.michellegall.com

Running, Zumming and Teaching

I love the open road! Many of my college dates found me riding on the back of a motorcycle. After a trip to Greece this spring where most people ride scooters or motorcycles, I felt compelled to purchase a Yamaha Zuma. Maybe I am trying to recapture my youth.

This seemed to launch me on the road to setting and accomplishing other goals.

Studying European History was my first goal, and I made A's in all three of my classes. This is quite an accomplishment. I thought of history as facts and timelines, and memorizing facts has always been difficult. A wonderful professor proved me wrong.

My next goal - to beat my times from the last four years for running the Kentlands/Lakelands 5K. The weather was perfect for racing. I took almost four minutes off my best time!

Another interest is digital photography. My goal was to restore some black and white photos from my mother's youth. It was a sentimental project and the restored photos looked much better than the originals.

I’m now teaching basic math again to students lacking those educational skills. I’ve realized through all of these life goals that it’s important to give it your best with patience, compassion and determination – and you’ll be a winner.

Tammy

Rediscovering the Cello, Story of a Yo Yo Mama

When I was in the fourth grade, I began taking cello lessons. I played for 4 years and even played a solo for the PTA! About 6 years ago, I developed a burning desire to play the cello again. My first step was to start a fund to purchase my cello, as they aren't inexpensive.

In December 2002 I had diligently saved enough money, and with the excitement of a kid at Christmas, I headed to a shop that specializes in fine stringed instruments. To listen for exactly the tone I knew I wanted, one of the shop owners played a number of cellos for me. At this point I couldn't even remember the key signature of the strings! As I wrote the check for my "Celli", tears of joy ran down my face.

I found a wonderful instructor and quickly moved from "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" to an advanced intermediate cellist. I had to give up the lessons after about 18 months, but I continue to practice daily, if at all possible. The sound is so beautiful! My next goal is to play the Bach Suites! - Janet, age 58

My First Triathlon

For the past 5 years or so, I have had a dream of becoming a competitive athlete again. As a child I spent every day engaged in some sport and was a pretty determined little athlete. But after graduating from high school, I was burnt out on sports and quit my college team after the first month of practice. Ever since then I've felt as if I'd lost a part of my identity...the 'jock' part of me. I missed the feeling of training to be 'excellent' at something, of working toward a tangible objective, and, most significantly, I missed the deep sense of self-esteem that comes from hard work and committment. So, this year I decided that I would set my dream of being a competetive athlete again in motion, with racing a triathlon as my goal.

First, I wrote down and articulated this goal to my friends. Then, I found a triathlon team in New York City. This was a critical step because it gave me the support, the technical know-how, and the accountability that forced me to do the training. The first day I joined the team for practice, I was terrified. But in only a few minutes, I began to feel like I was back in high school getting energy, encouragement, and some good healthy competition from my teammates. Low and behold, the workout was fun!

The best part of this experience, however, was having my boyfriend, friends, and family support me in achieving my goal. This picture is of my boyfriend and me after the race. I was so proud of myself and I had his love behind me the entire way - I couldn't have been happier (well, and I also knew that we were going to celebrate the finish with lots of friends later that night!). - Sasha, CabinetGirls.com

A Rockin' Bod in 2006

My goal is to be muscular, fit and flexible at my ideal weight of 115 pounds by February 15, 2006. I achieve this goal in a healthy way; eating soulfully, for both nutrition and pleasure. I eat foods I love and indulge in treats such as massages and hours of tanning to 106.7 LITE FM on my roof, as opposed to Coldstone Creamery crackwhore antics. I exercise at least three times a week by doing activities that make me happy, such as boxing in Central Park, dancing to 80's music and watching cheesy R. Kelly videos on VH1 while burning lots of cals on the eliptical. This goal is aligned with many of my core values. I help people create positive, dynamic change in their lives, and by changing myself in a postive way I am empowering others by being the model. Other values this goal is aligned with are experiencing optimum health, joy, laughter and pleasure, staying focused on my goals, living a life of adventure and fun, taking responsibility for my actions and creating a balanced life.
I am going to post a photo at every ten pound loss. The one here is after my first ten pound loss. Please send positive messages of inspiration and focus...
Here's to all of us having rockin' bods in 2006 and loving ourselves every single day. - Brette

A Long-Awaited Trip to Egypt

Having grown up as a child in a Foreign Service family, I was lucky enough to live in many wonderful places around the world. As my own children grew up, I hoped to be able to share some of those wonderful memories with them as well. One of the places that I particularly wanted to take them was to Egypt where I had lived for four years in the early 60’s in Cairo. We never seemed to be able to find the right time and then, after 9/11, it began to seem impossible. My husband and I kept putting off a trip to the Middle East as we waited for the political climate to improve. In the fall of 2003, I finally decided that we could end up waiting forever for things to change and we made plans to go over the Christmas vacation, come what may. I managed to corral all three children (no easy feat!) as well as my husband and we set out for a magical two weeks. The Egyptians couldn’t have been more welcoming and it was enormously gratifying to me for my family to begin to understand my love for that part of the world. Don’t put it off! - Ellen

Beyond our comfort zones

A few years ago, I initiated a personal policy to challenge myself to do one thing a year that really scares me. My ‘scary thing’ for 2005 was to complete a 7 day field course at Boulder Outdoor Survival School (BOSS). I had heard about the program from a friend I admired and it took me two years to muster up the courage to go for it. BOSS prides itself on teaching their students how to live in the wilderness with limited supplies in a simulated survival experience. Basically, we hiked in the desert for a week without the basic camping comforts of sleeping bags, backpacks, stoves, eating utensils, or tents/tarps. So, I had to learn to whittle my own spoon out of wood, make fire with a spindle and bow (which, of course, I carved myself), and create a backpack out of a wool blanket and parachute cord. It was, without question, one of the hardest weeks of my life, both physically and mentally. The point of my policy is not to torture myself (although I did swear to never do survival school again:), but to push myself beyond my comfort zone. And when I actually do the ‘scary thing’ I thought I couldn’t do…I feel pretty darn good about myself! What I did to get this goal done: allowed myself to dream of doing something wild, set aside sacred time and funds for my ‘scary thing’ policy, but the most important part was just showing up and hanging in there. -Sasha

Mother-Daughter Weekend Ritual

"Several years ago, I got the idea of going away with my daughter once a year for just a Mother-Daughter weekend where we would do anything she wanted to do. So I set aside a weekend, asked my daughter where she most wanted to go, and we booked a bed and breakfast. All weekend we basked in our aloneness and bonded in new and wonderful ways. Now it's a ritual that we wouldn't miss for the world and we're already planning our 2006 getaway. The picture attached is of us draped in white sheets prior to getting a massage and mineral bath in Berkeley Springs, West Virginia during our second getaway. The most important steps in achieving this goal were telling people we were doing it, having a visual reference of where we wanted to go by going through travel sites and maps together, setting aside the time and making it sacred, doing it together, and making sure nothing interfered with our planning."

Turning the impossible into a dream come true

My goal was to take my son on a wonderful vacation out of the country. I was in the middle of a financial crisis and was successfully crawling out little by little through strict budgeting. I decided, however, that I really wanted to take my son somewhere special on vacation. I mentioned it to my mother and began to sharpen my pencil to find out how I could save the money to go ... in the meantime my mother mentioned my goal to a mutual friend who I had not been in touch with for awhile -- coincidentally she had found a great deal for herself and her kids to go to Cancun. I was able to take advantage of her great pricing and we shared some expenses -- we went to Cancun and in the process rekindled an old friendship. To see the excitement on my son's face as he's being kissed by dolphins is priceless.

Master Swimmer

"I was a swimmer when I was younger, but I developed an eating disorder at the age of 14 that ruined all of my competitive dreams. As I got older and swimming techniques became more refined, I wondered what it would be like to become a Masters swimmer and compete again, but I was still scared. One day, a friend told me she'd become a Masters swimmer and that she was swimming close to her high school times. She looked at least ten years younger than her age, was brimming with vitality, and I was intrigued. So when I heard a Masters program was starting near me, I told the coach I was interested in trying one day a week, but I pulled myself out of the water after the first practice and said, "I'm in." I set a goal of competing again, and did, winning my events at my first meet. The picture here is of me with some of my teammates (I'm on the left) at the University of Maryland on June 19th, 2005. Now I have a goal of competing and placing at Masters Nationals next year at Stanford University! The most important steps in achieving this goal were knowing people who had achieved what I wanted, finding a program that fit my needs, putting a picture in my goals scrapbook about this goal, reading as much as I could about Masters swimmers, and doing it in a supportive community."

Spending my 40th birthday in Paris with a man I love

After being single for several years (after a bad break up) I decided I was ready to be in a relationship with a special person. I discussed it with my Coach and we decided to get really out there and set a goal to be in Paris with a special man on my 40th birthday. We wrote down the goal -- I worked hard on my "perfect man for me" list of attributes and I started making myself more available to do things with friends, etc. Within 8 months, I met the perfect man for me -- at a restaurant while I was dining out with girlfriends! Another girlfriend of mine mentioned that she was going to Paris on business and was bringing her boyfriend and asked if we wanted to go along. The trip was scheduled for October - one week before my 40th birthday. Needless to say we went and it was wonderful!

Caroline's Black Belt Story

When my daughter started Hapkido at the age of five, someone suggested to me that she'd be more likely to stick with the sport if a parent did it with her. So I watched her classes, talked to other adults who were black belts, and asked the instructors if I could do the program in a "mommy" way -- over a number of years to accommodate my young children. I wrote down my goal of being a black belt, told everyone I wanted to become a black belt, and envisioned myself onstage receiving my black belt from our Grand Master. Five years later, after many bumps, bruises and mental challenges -- I became a black belt! The most important steps for me in achieving this goal were having other adult black belts as role models, breaking it down into many reasonable steps, telling people about my goal and doing it with someone I love -- my daughter, who is also a black belt now!"

Brian made the All Star team with Mom's support!

Getting my son involved with sports:

I was a single Mom with an uninvolved ex-husband for 8 years. I always wanted my son Brian to participate in sports, but having a full time job, I was never able to commit to taking him to all of the games and practices. When I met my now husband, I told him about my goal and he offered to help however possible. My son now plays basketball and baseball -- he just completed his 3rd season of baseball and not only did well and enjoyed it, but he made the All Star team!

Samantha's story

"I wanted to swim faster in my favorite event -- the 50 meter breaststroke -- so I set a goal of going under an All-Star time that is set by our local swim league. I told my coach, my family and my friends about my goal, and my parents said that I could earn an iPod if I achieved this ambitious goal. I listened carefully to my coach when she suggested how to swim this race faster, I practiced the tips a lot, and I visualized myself winning races and doing this time. I even had a dream that I was swimming and I turned into a pink iPod and the girls next to me turned into ugly iPods. Last week I went under the time goal I set for myself (I dropped five seconds) and I got my iPod the next day! The most important steps in achieving this goal were having a specific time goal, having an incentive that was something I really wanted, telling all my friends and teammates about my goal, and believing that I could actually do it."